Ultimately, I’m an optimist. Even about York University, which claims to have a deficit for its faculty funding and pays a man $700,000 when they fire him for committing fraud.


But in my personal affairs, I am an optimist. It might make me naive, but thanks mainly to my mother, I see “No“s as “Try harder and try something different“.

For example, this week I

  • lost my promised summer job
  • got rejected by my first-choice graduate program
  • had 1 of 2 of our family guinea pigs die
  • and my puppy decided it was time to diarrhea on the carpet upstairs as well as start crying for 3 hours before she went to sleep, driving me to tears at 2 am on a Friday night

But what the hell am I going to do about any of those things, apart from moving on and doing better?

I’ll stop letting my dog eat rocks and grass, for one.

I can’t naturally do anything about the guinea pig issue except comfort my little sister. The graduate school that I was pinning all my hopes and dreams on really didn’t deserve all my hopes and dreams in the end, it seems. I should dream bigger than graduate school, methinks. And while some may disagree that college is an awesome post-undergrad option (they’d be wrong, but I accept people’s willingness to look dumb for whatever reason), I’ve been thinking about enrolling in a post-graduate course at Humber next year (web design and development? tech skills, whee! Side note: has anyone taken this?).

I should have seen the future preparing to kick me in the ass for wanting to do more schooling, but this is only 1 year and it’s at college — which I’ve heard is a wholly different experience from university. Sure, I won’t get to write a thesis on autobiography in social media, but maybe I’ll write that as an article and pitch it to one of the magazines that I love to read instead? Maybe that will be better, because I’ll be doing my research like I know I am capable of doing it. (Like a pro.)

That being said, there’s still 3 programs I haven’t heard back from, but after hearing back from my first choice, every wonderful neuron that I own is running for my amygdala*. Thanks for the hint, neurons!

So, I’m looking for a (summer/not summer?) job/ internship/ contract/ money!

I’m also up for any international travel articles that need writing, editors!


I’m actually kind of looking forward to frolicking with my pup all summer (and starting to run? for my 50th attempt at learning to love running?), who, by the way, is fracking adorable, if you didn’t already know.

Sure, there are a lot of unknowns, and sure, this week sucked big fracking balls (as some weeks are known to), but I come home and my puppy flips out from (or with?) love, and there was some really awesome 80s music on the radio on my way to tutoring today, and the sun is still shining and I still have a million goals and a million places I’ve never been but plan on going.

I think maybe in the 80s people knew how to handle different scenarios with synchronized dance scenes, and thus didn’t get as stressed as we do today. Maybe that’s my solution?

Who’s up for it, guys?


I need a life makeover inspired by 80s music and dancing in a baseball field/high school/barn. Either you volunteer or I pick tributes.

P.S. YES, Rumi does in fact look a little bit like Lady from Lady and the Tramp. ladyandthetramp

*This may or may not be scientifically accurate, but the amygdala is somehow involved with fear, according to the snippet of Wikipedia that I glanced at.

2 thoughts on “Optimism/spring

  1. I’m also done my undergrad this year and considering doing a one year accelerated program at either George Brown or Seneca instead of grad school! It’s a hard choice between more theoretical academia and the practical work experience that comes with college but they’re both awesome post-undergrad options. Not getting in to your first choice may actually be a blessing in disguise. It opens up doors you may not have considered before. Good luck with whatever you choose!


    • I do agree that they’re awesome options. I was considering a college post-grad even before I fully committed to applying to Masters programs (see: ALL THE ARTICLES haha), but it is still quite a sting to my ego. 😛

      Thank you! What kind of programs are you looking at Lana/what program are you graduating from?


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